Welcome to the ‘AFL Meme Forecast’, where our meme specialists here at The First Reserve will predict which memes are expected to rise or fall in value for the upcoming round. We will suggest what to buy, keep or sell based on our in-depth meme analysis. It’s kind of like a share market report … just way more fucking stupid.
Being the first round of the season, it’s especially difficult to predict what’s going to happen. But based on last year’s season (shown in the graph below) and pre-season matches, we can expect to see these memes show up on our social media feeds:
We don’t expect the Tigers to lose to Carlton tonight, but if they do we guarantee the ‘Premiership Hangover’ memes will be selling like hot cakes. Richmond memes were extremely volatile last year, but they have an exceptionally high ceiling as shown by the graph. They peaked at rounds 8 and 9 after two last minute losses to Fremantle and GWS. A risky investment, but worthwhile if it pays off. BUY.
The ‘Owen’ memes always appear at the start of the season. The team that goes the longest amount of time without a win will subsequently cop the most shit. For example, last year Sydney went the first six rounds without a victory, which is when the ‘Owen Six’ memes peaked (usually accompanied by a picture of Owen Wilson’s head). Not a lot of potential and only have value until every team has a win. SELL.
Brian Taylor is literally a walking meme. It’s a low-risk, low-reward investment, as value is already sky-high but very unlikely to drop any time soon, making for an easy steady income. Keep an eye out for when he enters the changerooms of the winning team on Friday night, because it’s a near certainty for him to do or say something stupid. When he does, footy meme pages will be all over it like Ricky Nixon on a teenage school girl. BUY.